As I begin to pen this down, I wonder how different the article would have been on a timeframe exactly a year back. Could my story be any different? I think so. I would have written an article surely from the ivory towers; an idealistic view, a romanticism which consumes you in the 20’s and makes you want to do bigger and constructive things for your country, a frame of mind which doesn’t make ‘n’ number of bullet points to tell you the reasons for why things will not happen, a world view which measures impact in micro terms than larger feel good numbers of tokenism. Anyways, here goes my mental time travel.
Point blank, I joined because I was tired of being part of a consuming generation and wanted to express my idealism constructively. I joined Unilever at the expense of an international job for satisfying the nationalist within me. I have always worn my patriotism on my sleeve. I still get goose bumps when I sing the national anthem and do the pledge. I fell for the Hindustan lever vision,” To make a real difference to each and every Indian”. I rationalized that I worked for a company whose products reach out to 2 out of 3 Indians and make a difference to everyday life. I designed and executed technologies for Kwality Walls at the time I quit. I had a very successful early professional life and a very satisfying job intellectually. Anybody who knows Unilever knows that they pamper you well in cash and kind. I was in the orbit for the bigger league but not really. My weekend volunteer work in Mumbai troubled me more than making me happy. My local train rides disillusioned me more than getting me home. My studio apartment in Wadala showed me slums through the French windows than the early morning tinge of yellowish orange. One question troubled me every day of my work,” Why am I doing what I am doing when I know 800 million in this country can’t afford an ice cream?”Paraphrasing what Steve jobs said in his famous Stanford speech remarked,” Look at yourself in the mirror everyday and ask yourself that question. If the answer to that is NO day after day, it’s time to reconsider what you love”. The reactions at Unilever were expected to my decision to take up the fellowship– more of shock, some dose of corporate awe (anybody who’s done CSR at his company understands what I mean) and large measures of cynicism. I told you before that a long corporate career does make you a realist. Well, I told my folks there that in life I’d prefer to be a lotus in the muck rather than a rose in the nursery. A white lotus is the symbol of primordial purity. It represents the blossoming of wholesome deeds in blissful liberation floating above the muddy waters of attachment, desire and self indulgence. A metaphor which connects to me and which inspired me to take the plunge. To the thought of idealism that every child in my country needs an excellent education, to the clarion call that this is the independence struggle my generation needs to respond to, I decided to DO and search for my utopia in the muck! Not in any self righteousness, but only to find myself, in acting in line with my thoughts. And after 10months at TFI, I love Steve jobs for the pearl of wisdom! Do what you love. Period. My search for Utopia in the muck….TFI?
Very powerful and inspiring Tarun!
how thoughtful. Thanks for the inspiration.
